“Worry is a cycle of inefficient thoughts whirling around a center of fear.”

-Corrie ten Boom-

Worry gets in to all the crevices of our lives. We worry about our jobs, our kids, our relationships, money, and a million other things every single day. It’s no wonder we feel like we’re not getting things done the way we’d like.  And we must ponder, what does worry actually accomplish?

Thankfully, it doesn’t have to be this way. To change your life and stop worrying, ask yourself these important questions:

What Are You Really Worried About?

Many times, worry is a mask for something else entirely. A hard look and some pointed questions might be necessary to get to the heart of the matter. On the other hand, once you have a clear understanding of what the real issue is, it’s easier to address the problem and stamp out the worry completely.  We must be introspective here to truly establish the root cause.  Critical thinking is essential.

Is This Even Possible?

Worry inflates everything to monster proportions. If your worry seems slightly ridiculous, it probably is. Take a step back and ask yourself just how likely this outcome is. Worry can’t stand up under this kind of scrutiny.  Maintain perspective in all things, don’t allow tunnel vision/focus.

Is This Something I Can Control?

We’re very good at worrying about something we can’t change. Seriously, what difference does it make if it snows tomorrow? It is what it is. Nothing we do can keep the flakes from falling. Accept sometimes you’re just going to have to go with the flow and adapt to the circumstances. We don’t want it, but we know adversity builds character.

Does this Affect Me Today?

Worries about the future can really derail your life today. If you’re worried about something far off, it’s time to take a step back. Ask yourself a fundamental follow-up question if you’re concerned about the future: “Is there something I can do today that will prevent this outcome tomorrow?” If so, now you have a plan of action. Get to it!  If not, remember to live for today.  Worry about the past or future has no bearing on results.

Am I Spending Too Much Time?

Obsessive worry doesn’t help anyone. If you find yourself circling back to the same concern over and over, you might need help breaking out of this cycle. You are stuck in the “goofy loop” and nothing will be accomplished while in it. Consider talking to someone, such as a good friend or even a counselor or trained professional, to help you break out of this vicious cycle. I teach all the time that we are made for relationship and interaction.  Stop being an island to yourself.  Find those that positively move you forward.

Why Do I Care What Others Think?

If you’re worried about the opinions of others, why? If you’re concerned about impressing your boss, there are better ways to do this than worrying. More often than not, though, you’re going to find most people’s opinions really don’t matter. Don’t let them get to you. Remember my recent blog on naysayers and never being able to please them.  Just continue to operate with integrity and credibility and you will be fine.

Once you have the answers to these questions, you’ll find it’s easy to get your thoughts back on track. Worry becomes a thing of the past when we’re mindful of it, and don’t let it become obsessive. Imagine the difference a life without so much worry will make.

Will we worry, absolutely, but when we do let’s remember to self-reflect, analyze, and plan the solution to our problems.  Over the last several weeks and as we move forward, I am committed to provide material to not only help you in your profession, but to help you across the full spectrum of your life.

In our work, I speak all the time about integrity, credibility, and consistency.  How essentially critical it is in interviewing and professionally, but it is paramount to success in our personal and family life as well.  If we are consistent across the entire spectrum of life, things go much smoother with less turbulence and less worry.

Please take time, step back, and evaluate what needs to see change.  Then do it.  If it feels overwhelming, find those trusted fellow travelers, and enlist their help.  This my friends is called planning, please do it. As Benjamin Franklin once said, “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” 

In the end, worry can become very attached to the familiar. Challenge yourself. Find a different way to do things. Explore where this path takes you.  Remember what is said about insanity; “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.”

When it comes to accomplishing goals and minimizing worry have you considered if you are having success, or are you just winging it?  Do you plan for opportunities and prepare to handle worry that will undoubtedly come. If not, why not? 

Anderson Investigative Associates is positioned to custom-tailor training to your specific needs.  If you have any questions or would like to discuss the above issues of worry and how to handle it or any training need, please reach out.  Additional issues pertaining to interviewing, auditing, and investigations can be found in other blogs and videos that I have produced and are contained in most blocks of instruction that our company presents.

If you have additional questions, comments, or have an interviewing topic you would like me to address, give me a shout.  In the meantime, be well, stay safe out there, and find a way to redirect your worrying….otherwise you will go nowhere fast.

Mark A. Anderson

Director of Training and Development

Anderson Investigative Associates, llc

114 Loucks Avenue

Scottdale, PA 15683